RELUCTANT PRESS

physical trauma. He said to be patient and everything would turn out all right. I hope he's right, but I'm scared.

Tomorrow will be my first day back at school. I'm still exhausted. The bruises and stiffness are almost gone. The headaches are hardly noticeable. I feel terrible inside my head, like maybe I'm going crazy or something. Whenever I fall asleep, I relive seeing Miss Malloy aging after she died. It's real spooky. I'm afraid to tell Mom 'cause she'll think I'm wacky or something; of course, maybe I HAVE gone wacky. If not, I'm real close. I needed to tell someone, so I told Cindy. She's into that mystical kind of stuff.

After listening to what I said, she sat quietly for several moments, just staring at me. It made me feel all goose bumpy. I could tell she was debating whether or not to tell me something.

Finally she spoke.

"Since the accident I've been picking up strange vibrations from you. Your aura is changing colors like a kaleidoscope. Before the accident, you generally projected a green personality with a typically male blue shimmer...a light blue, not the deep macho blue like Pete's or Scott's.

"But, since the accident, it's been all mixed up and swirling through the rainbow. When I saw you in the hospital, your aura would fade and come back into the light blue, then shimmer into rainbow colors before fading again. Now that you're over the worst of the injuries, your aura doesn't fade, but it hasn't returned to your former blue."

I guess it was plain to her that I had no idea what she meant. With a smile of pity for my hopeless state, she went on. "It means you're going through a process of major change, but the outcome is still up in the air."

Cindy didn't relieve my anxiety; in fact, she made it worse. Obviously, I wasn't all that masculine before the crash with that light blue aura.

Now, it's not ANY shade of blue, but an ever-changing cascade of colors!

TWO LITTLE GIRLS

By JENNIFER SUE

No wonder I feel crummy and uncertain of myself. Maybe THAT'S why I can't get hard anymore!

Despite Cindy's best efforts, I still haven't been able to get it up. She's upset, since she's become addicted to getting laid, and I was her source. Fortunately, she understands and is not blaming me.

I just hope after getting back to school, things will start returning to normal.

Journal Entry: September 30, 1997

I hoped returning to school would make things go back to the way they were before the crash. Unfortunately, it was really weird in school. Things just didn't seem right. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't put my finger on what was wrong. It wasn't until French class that it hit me like a sledge hammer on my head.

As normal, I was looking forward to seeing the usual bevy of miniskirted girls flirting and competing for Mr. Drew. Like most of the guys in the class, I always got turned on by the flirting girls. But today, it didn't happen. I felt no arousal at all as I watched the girls. It was plain the other guys were turned on as usual, but for ME...nothing. Something was very wrong. Out of frustration I actually began to pay attention to the lesson Mr. Drew was teaching. My eyes seemed drawn to him, I had never noticed just how attractive he was. No wonder the girls were so gaga over him!

While I was thinking that stuff, I felt the familiar warm feeling of arousal inside that I got in the past. Needless to say, I was REAL happy to realize that I was getting aroused! Dr. Harvey had been right, all I needed was time to recover! In the past I'd have a boner through most of the class while watching the girls. The bubble burst as I realized my penis STILL hadn't gotten hard. With a sickening fear, I realized I hadn't been paying attention to the girls, but to Mr. Drew!

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